Impacts on Reality

(11/26/14)

Photo from here.

I had a really vivid dream last night of being pulled over by the police in a car I wasn't driving. There were two officers who were super aggressive and demanded us to get out of the car so they could search the car and, as dreams go, to search my car that was parked across the street. (It was the 1994 Ford Thunderbird that I miss as much as I miss people). Of course I refused to consent to a search and asked what was the problem, which outraged the officers. But somehow how in all the confusion and high tension, I was able to calm the officers down and they ended up sitting in the car with us, agreed they were over reacting, and eventually left.

This would never happen in real life.

In real life I am sure I would have either submitted to the search or been so verbal as to get myself arrested. Which lead me to another mid-sleep though, if I were locked up, refused to talk, and insisted on an attorney...who in the universe would I call?

So this morning I raked my brain, figured out who is the nearest trust-worthy criminal defense attorney is that I know and added the firm's number to my phone. Along with a 24-hour defense hotline number, just in case.

Oh the wonder of dreaming.

On Death and Dying

(05/08/14)

First of all, suicide sucks. If you find yourself thinking that the end is near and you want to expedite the race to the finish, don't. Please call 1-800-273-TALK(8255). Or call me. And know that if you call me, you're going to get a personal visit from me as soon as my ugly car can drive to be by your side. And if I have your mom's number, I am going to call her too. We are all going to be there. Just like we are on the days when you're not plotting your demise. That's the public service announcement portion of this post.

So, death. I think that is the easy part. It is the "life" part that is more challenging. From what I can tell, those days just before the end are often the very worst. We grasp for hope, for meaning, for purpose and then spend most of our days striving to achieve...something. I don't think it matters much what that "something" is, as long as it fulfills (or seeks to fulfill) that small, still voice that connects soul to life. For me, that "something" is creating. Right now it is creating glass work, sometimes the creation is a big party, other times it is weeding the side yard (to undo the "creating" of a neglected garden). For you, I am sure, that connection is different. It seems, as long as I am seeking a path to satisfy that voice, then the purpose of my life is fulfilled.

What is it that derails our connection to the soul and the feeling of being whole? A bad childhood, maybe. Or a dissatisfying marriage, perhaps. Sometimes it is addiction, or depression, grief, or the general ennui felt as life approaches and you're measuring yourself against a yardstick meant for someone else.

Being swept away by the world and not stopping to re-connect will create the chasm of darkness. From what I can tell, after recognizing the darkness, the most difficult step is asking for help. To admit that the connection-to-self cannot be made feels worse than the missing connection itself. Life isn't easy; there is nothing worse than being alone on that island of departure-from-self.

It would be nice if I could wrap this post up with an unscientific truth about how to avoid the path of self-destruction, but I don't have one. All I know is that is really is awful to be the ones left behind when a friend finds them self on the lonely, lonely island and takes a dive off the cliff face of reality, never to return again. How much I would give to make them step back, to turn around and come running down the hill and stay with us for just one more night.

Like I said, suicide sucks. A whole, whole lot.

These Things Make Me Smile

(04/29/14)

Trolling the internet for inspiration and smiles often leads me to laughing out loud and thinking of the specific people who would also love what I find.

This certainly should belong to my baby sister:

Available here

And, well this one is for my baby sister, too:

Available here

My other sister would like this art:

Available here

On Friendship

(04/21/14)

On Friendship

I asked a friend to write an essay about "Being a Good Friend." In my opinion, she is one of the best keepers of people I have ever met. She regularly corresponds with people from her long-ago past and keeps tabs on the happenings of hundreds with only rare reliance on social media for sourcing.

So, after a good deal of time passed and I did not get an essay back, I inquired. You know what she said?That she wrote the essay; it was only one word: persistence.

Another Great Idea

(03/11/2014)

I know I am not yet in charge of the world, but when I am, there will be a few changes. First, in elevators, there will be a skip pattern. The elevator will not stop on back-to-back floors. People must start taking the stairs. Two flights of stairs is not too much to ask. Sure, there are people who physically cannot walk the stairs so I will need to come up with an exclusion/inclusion principle, but let's leave that aside for a minutes. If the elevator stops on the 9th floor to pick someone up, the guy who pressed 10 is now out of luck and needs to get out, take a hike or get off at 11 and walk down. It would just save a lot of time. And it would improve the general well being of the whole city. Small steps, people. Small steps. And frankly, I think this should be a three-floor skip pattern, but we have to start somewhere.

photo credit: http://uiobservatory.com/media/2011/ElevatorButtonPanel.png

Ft. Myers, Florida

(3/21/2010)

"Within all of us there is an illusive melody, which when heard and followed will lead you to the fulfillment of your fondest dreams."

(03/21/2014)

Funny how four years have passed and this blog entry was never expanded upon. Either I can't hear the melody or I have heard it and just keep playing a different tune. Or, wait, that is wrong. I actually have fulfilled my fondest dreams...just waiting on more dreams to come.

"Soon, no one will even know how to try a case!"

(01.29.2011)
This week I have had the most wonderful opportunity to meet with local attorneys for a variety of reasons. One meet up was in regard to an upcoming event where practitioners will have the chance to ask local judges for their candid response to a number of questions. As part of the planning for the event, we were brainstorming questions that could be posed to the judges. One attorney was formulating an idea that would question the frequency that judges refer cases to mediation. The response from another lawyer was: "If judges keep referring cases to mediation, soon no [attorney] will even know how to try a case!" From his tone, it was clear that this would be a travesty. No attorneys litigating would be the end of his world. Oddly, or perhaps obviously, it dawned on me that if we as a society got to a point where alternative dispute resolutions were the norm and not the exception, I would be the happiest attorney in town. Society needs a shift.